Recording was still as stressful as ever- but that was the day job. Nick practised what Dr. Belkin called “Calming Techniques” as he opened the door to the restaurant and walked inside.
It was lunch time and the restaurant was nowhere near as full as it had been the evening he had collapsed. He felt very anxious as he approached the spot where he collapsed. Nick stared at it, imagining himself there, fitting and bleeding as the others had described. He clutched the small bouquet of flowers he had brought as he increasingly felt tense. He made himself focus on his breathing, and reminded himself that he could overcome whatever worrying situations that were going to arise.
“Can I help you?” A blond waiter asked as he came out from behind the bar. He had watched Nick for a few minutes and wondered why he was staring at the floor.
“Erm” Nick hesitated, feeling his body begin to heat up and some sweat build on his back. But he stayed as calm as possible. He knew if he didn’t face this head on now, he never would. “Can I speak to your manager please?”
“Of course, and who can I say is here for him?” The waiter replied politely.
“Nick Carter.” Nick replied under his NY baseball cap. He noted a look on the waiter’s face that told Nick that he knew who he was.
“Sure.” He said walking away and into a back room, through a door next to the bathroom Nick had been heading for not so long ago.
Nick felt faint, but he felt he was doing fine. “At least I’m not on the floor dying from a panic attack” Nick said in his head, as the well dressed manager approached him and shook his hand, distracting him from the spot on the floor.
“Hello Nick, how are you doing?” He asked kindly, and warmly.
Of course, no manager would have liked anyone, especially a celebrity to die or be harmed in their restaurant.
“Much better thank you.” Nick replied with a smile. “Just trying to make peace with what happened.”
The manager nodded in agreement and empathy. “Can I get you a drink?” The manager offered. Dr. Belkin had suggested no alcohol. Nick thought that sucked. However, it was too early really for alcohol; it was in fact only 1 pm.
“No thank you I’m fine. I wasn’t going to stay I just wanted to say thank you, for all you did for me that night, I really appreciate it” Nick trailed off and began to feel more panicked, but he mentally took hold of his shoulders and told himself to get a grip. “I was told without your employees’ quick response I could have died right there on the floor.” Nick looked again, as did the manager.
“Well, I‘m glad you’re doing much better.” The manager commented, eying the flowers Nick had in his hand. Nick followed his eyes and realised what he was looking at.
“Oh” Nick began. “I was wondering if Heather was here today, these are for her.”
“How sweet.” The manager said. “She’s actually just finished her shift, and will be out in a moment. I’ll let her know you’re here for her.”
“Thank you.” Nick said. The manager shook his hand once more.
“Let us know how you’re doing alright?” He insisted, Nick nodded but he Didn’t have that many intentions of returning to this place. The manager disappeared where he had appeared and Nick watched as waiters and waitresses entered and exited through the door. He was in day dream when Heather walked out of the door wearing her normal clothes, not her uniform. Nick imagined this was concealed in the bag she was carrying-too big to be a hand bag he thought. He laughed internally at himself. “You know about handbags-you must have dated Paris for too long.” She scanned the room looking for him, and smiled when she spotted him. Her smile made him weaker-perhaps he should dial 911 now. She approached and informally hugged him. He opened his embrace to her, and smelled the freshness of her hair, that was slightly curly as it had been released from being tied tightly in a bun. She gave nice cuddles and it was not as if Heather didn’t notice the warmth of his embrace either.
“How are you?” Heather asked with a look of genuine concern on her face.
“Much better.” Nick said.”These are for you.” He presented her with the small collection of flowers.
Her face lit up at the sight of the kind gesture- she was not expecting this at all.
“You know for, saving my life.” Nick joked in a way like it was a small occurrence, and not the life-altering one it had been. She had saved his life. She giggled and accepted the flowers gracefully.
“Your welcome.” She said, not knowing exactly what to say. Her face dropped to a serious stature. “It was pretty terrifying.” She confessed to him; she had clearly been distressed by the ordeal, and this evoked Nick’s guilt and sympathy, but this wasn’t really a situation to apologise for, although he wanted to. There was a brief, chemistry filled pause between them, which Heather broke.
“So, why did you collapse? Did the doctors figure it out?” She asked innocently.
Nick mulled over in his head whether or not to disclose the details of his health to a near stranger.
“I’d rather talk about it in more of a private setting” He whispered to her, as a few people were staring at them.
She noticed this after. Nick giggled. Did she even know his name? “I’m Nick by the way” He introduced himself and she laughed sweetly.
“I know who you are.” She confessed; Nick registered a second look that would suggest that she did in fact know he was a Backstreet Boy. He was relieved and disappointed at the same time. If the new people he met didn’t know who he was, it was difficult telling them what he does for a living, but on the other hand, that person could make no judgement on him, as they would have no knowledge of his “celebrity” life.
“So erm” Nick hesitated and he worried if she was noticing that he was stressed. “What are you doing now?” He stumbled out with a slight stutter. Her facial expression told him she was relaying plans she had for the day behind her eyes.
“Nothing until about four. I was just going to go home and relax for a bit.” She confessed, sensing perhaps that Nick was asking her out.
“Well do you want to go and get a coffee or some lunch or something?” Nick asked politely. Nick saw immediately that her face became uncomfortable.
“What did I say?” Nick asked himself in a hurry, but his mind was unsure.
She readjusted her bag on her shoulder before taking a breath. “I’m seeing someone.” She confessed, trying to be as gentle as she could. She ran her hands through her hair nervously, Nick watched as her hair resettled naturally. He tried desperately not to see this as defeat, but he did almost immediately.
“Typical.” He thought. “Just typical.” He changed his tactics.
“Well I didn’t necessarily mean it like that” Nick suggested. “I just wanted to get to know you a little, just to hang out” Nick shrugged which informed Heather it was her time to decide.
“Ok then why not?” She decided with a smile.
Nick could not believe she had agreed. He laughed at his own paranoia and insecurities because she had said yes. He was thrilled. Heather seeing someone made it to a degree easier for him; he immediately knew his boundaries and was not going to be greeted by the stress caused by not knowing where he stands. He relaxed completely as they headed out of the restaurant in search of some lunch.
